one very unpeaceful month.

March was pretty much the month from hell for me. I'm really sorry I haven't updated in a long time...things have been absolutely nuts 'round here! It's like once I turned 23, my world kind of came crashing down. Actually, it probably would have come crashing down earlier if I hadn't ignored certain things for so long. It was just super duper stressful and overwhelming and emotional and horrible. But now it's April and I'm hoping for a fresh start. Today was a good day. No work. I went to church, chatted with people, and cleaned parts of the house that haven't been touched in months. Including my room. My poor room.

I took breaks from cleaning and took pictures outside with the manual camera I inherited from my grandpa (mom's dad). Oh, but he's not dead...they just started giving stuff to the grandkids. The camera is super awesome, even though I don't know much about it. Today I learned that the teleconverter really helps when you're taking close-ups with the 50mm. I love my Grandpa! And I love photography!

I'm trying to find balance and peace in my life. It's hard when I work the weekends and people are constantly wanting to hang out with me...only they always want me to come to them. That's one big thing I really struggled with last month. I can't go everywhere all the time. I need time for myself, and last month was so busy I just couldn't take any breaks. In turn, I probably came off pretty bitchy to some people. For that, I am really sorry. But it was all just too much.

I can't take anymore days off. So you'll just have to work around my schedule. I have every other Sunday off and every Monday and Tuesday off. I get off earlier on Saturday nights (5:30pm) so I can usually do something those nights. I wish things were different, but they aren't. It has to be this way for awhile so I can show work that I'm dedicated and all that jazz. Ugh.

I also really really really want to move into town. Newberg, specifically. The daily hour roundtrip drive is getting really old. Finances are tight though, so it'll be awhile. Something to pray about, though. :-)

I think the only time I'll have peace and balance is when I'm on my own, not living next door to my parents and stuck in the middle of all the family issues. It's an exhausting job.

Sorry this update isn't very happy. I think things can only go up from here.